Medium - High

Indeterminate

Two undone

One brief look - flat and dark. Helmet the rest of the time

No Dietrich

Jan's Notes: Notes on The Wild Goose Raid, a.k.a. Geography 101
17 May 1999

It must have been a cold day in the desert because they are wearing their jackets through most of the episode. Tully has three lines: If he talks any more, his tongue is going to fall off.

Patrol is heading to the Headquarters of the 3rd Armored Division with orders to head up security for a meeting of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. On their way there, they spy a German courier. Patrol gives chase and runs into the German's scout column the courier was trying to reach (I suppose). Patrol gets the courier, sends the motorcycle into a hill and the motorcycle goes boom! They also destroy a couple of the halftracks in the scout column and the rest scurry away. Unfortunately, the courier bag is empty, so Patrol doesn't know if a) he hadn't picked up the dispatch yet, b) he managed to pass the dispatch over to the column before being killed or c) he was out for a joy ride and wasn't doing anything war related at all. Troy however is very suspicious that a "Kraut courier" was in the vicinity of HQ just before the bigwig meeting.

Patrol continues on to HQ. Troy and Moffitt go to report to Major Reese while Tully and Hitch take the jeeps down to the motor pool for servicing. Major Reese is not exactly ecstatic to have the Patrol heading security duty. He tells Troy and Moffitt that he would rather they just replenish their supplies, have a few beers, and then take off. Troy responds that he has been given orders to head security and that is what he intends to do. Troy also lets the Major know about the suspicious German courier. Major pooh-poohs Troy's concerns, emphasizing that there are no security problems. So why is there a mysterious Arab sitting on the roof on the building opposite and peering into the Major's window? He has a major crush on the Major?

Moffitt and Troy leave, and Reese calls in his right-hand man, Sergeant Roberts alias Superspy ,who looks amazingly like one of the cops from Adam-12. Oh, right, he is one of the cops from Adam-12. (At this point, I half expected to hear a voiceover: "One Adam twelve, One Adam twelve, 2-11 in progress at the L'Oasis Verte. Please respond." But I digress.) The Major is worried that Troy is going to do something to ruin his big chance to impress the powers-that-be, so he asks Superspy to keep an eye on Troy. However, Roberts has other plans.

Superspy goes down to the motor pool to meet Troy. There Superspy goes into a nice little spiel about how he prefers the cold and should have been in the ski troops and how he was the first on the slopes in Sun Valley, Nevada. (Mistake number one). Hitch and Tully announce that the jeeps are ready for action again, now what? Moffitt expresses a deep desire for a haircut. (Could his hair get any shorter?) Hitch wants a beer and Tully says nothing (as usual). Superspy offers to show Troy where the guys will be billeted while they are in town.

Superspy and Troy start off and then Superspy is stopped by a soldier who tells him that the Major wants him right away. So Superspy tells Troy that in order to get to the billets you have to walk down this dark alley. But he forgot to warn Troy about the inhospitable Arabs that he might meet. Troy gets three metres into this alley and he is jumped by two Arabs. Superspy hears the ruckus and returns to assist Troy (supposedly). Superspy lets one Arab get away. Troy retains the other who informs Troy about a bunch of Germans gathering outside the airstrip preparing for an attack when the Chiefs arrive. Troy leaves the Arab with Superspy supposing that Superspy will take the Arab to the guard house. The Arab asks Superspy if he did okay and Superspy says you did fine then kills him. (Mistake number two.)

Troy gathers up his men and they head out to find the massive group of Germans. But they can't find a German anywhere. Where are the Germans when you need them? They try to raise HQ on their radios and find that they have been disabled. Moffitt suspects the Arab but Troy remembers the monologue Superspy gave on his love of skiing --- then it clicks: Sun Valley is in Idaho, not Nevada. Patrol race back to HQ.

Meanwhile Major Reese and Superspy are leaving for the airstrip. Again an Arab (the brother of the one killed) is perched on the roof, this time with a rifle. Is the Arab shooting at a) the major, b) superspy, c) the pigeons on the roof opposite but the sight on the rifle is faulty? We don't know 'cause he misses, and Superspy shoots and kills him. This wee bit of excitement doesn't faze the Major, who is bound and determined to have this meeting even if it kills him. So he and Superspy head off to the airstrip.

Patrol arrive about 20 minutes after they have left. Troy sends Hitch to find the Arab that Troy left with Superspy and who should be cooling his heels in the guardhouse. Troy, Moffitt, and Tully head out to the airstrip. The airstrip is populated by camels and tanks, which gives a whole new complexion on clearing the runway. Also, those three guys have managed to get their jeep stuck again and are busy digging it out.

Moffitt and Troy confront Superspy with the fact that he is skiing in the wrong state and he had the Patrol sent on a "wild goose chase." (See how the title was worked into the dialogue. Those script writers are so clever.) The Major can't figure out what that has do with anything and practically accuses Troy of being on the German side. This Major is really, really dense. With officers like this, how is the world did the Allies win the war? Anyway, the Major is called in to the air traffic control centre (a little wooden shack) and Troy takes the opportunity to punch Superspy in the stomach. If we didn't know Superspy was a German by now, this would clinch it because Superspy turns out to have the strength and fortitude of sauerkraut. He doubles over and basically is rendered semi-conscious allowing Troy and Moffitt to bundle him into the Jeep with no resistance. They hightail it back to the Major's office where Moffitt and Tully start checking the place out for the bomb Troy figures Superspy has set. They look in file cabinets, over, under and in the water cooler, in empty card files, behind the American flag and underneath the conference table.

Superspy is still trying to bluff his way out of the situation. He doesn't know who he is dealing with, silly fellow. Hitch turns up to reports that the Arab never made it to the guard house but was found dead in the alley, knife in his gut. Troy tells Hitch to clear the area and not to let the Chiefs up here. I can just see Hitch, a private, refusing to let the Joint Chiefs into the building:

"You can't go up there, Sirs!"

"EXCUSE ME, PRIVATE!"

"My Sarge told me not to let you. You can't go in , Sirs. You just can't. "

And he would get right in their face like he did with Moffitt in The Two Against Time Raid.

Moffitt is examining underneath the conference table, and Tully goes to turn on the desk lamp to give him more light. Superspy makes a bolt for it, and Tully tackles him. Troy then tells Moffitt to check the table again and asks Tully what he was doing. Tully then realizes that the bomb is in the light. (Tully's big line.) Troy throws the lamp out the window and the lamp explodes, sending clouds of dust, smoke, and other assorted crap all over the place. Hope Hitch got the area cleared away in time. The men pick themselves up and dust themselves off. Superspy stands there looking extremely sheepish. Troy sends Tully off to find the MPs. He returns with the Major, Hitch and four MPs. Major takes a look at the remains of the conference room and gets the kill look from Troy and from Moffitt. (Troy has been giving lessons to Moffitt.) Superspy has a "When do I get to be the good cop?" look. The Major is gracious enough to apologize to Troy for doubting him. Superspy then starts whining about soldiers who don't follow orders and that he would have been successful if it wasn't for Troy, and why do the Allies have soldiers like Troy and the Allies are going to lose the war, blah , blah, blah. Tell it to someone who cares, Superspy. Major Reese responds by saying the Allies are going to win the war because they have soldiers who think for themselves. You tell him, Major.

Superspy is hauled off and Major makes a funny about Troy clearing the air. The Patrol then go on their way, Hitch running to his jeep and Tully sauntering. No sign of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, though. I was looking forward to seeing Eisenhower.

Jan

Rat Patrol Trivia: From what episode is the L'Oasis Verte from?

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